Tuesday, March 5, 2013

You might be a mom if .....

 How about some fun. After talking with some friends, reading multitudes of FB and twitter statuses and reading some other blogs I have compiled a list of 20 ways to see if you might be a mom.

You might be a mom if

1. a room of squealing naked girls is not an insane drunken night with your girlfriends but simply bath time for your daughters.
2. If your big purchase that you got such an awesome deal on that you have to share is the new Doc Mcstuffin kit that you scored for less than $20
3. You hide in odd spots to eat so you don't have to share your food
4  If this could be a statement you have said " The Moment I get away with eating a twix w/o my kids finding out I feel like  got away with murder."
5. If you know the previously mentioned attempts seem normal and sane to your friends
6. If you sneeze, run, jump, cough etc. and a little pee comes out.
7.  If the majority of your outfits are more about comfort than fashion
8. If  your answer to someone else who is yelling "I peed"  or " I pooped""Did you pee/poop in the potty?" because the answer could honestly be no
9. If you will happily leave your meal to go help wipe someone's bum.
10. If you sit down to eat a nice "cold" meal often.
11. When doing laundry you are frequently handling other peoples dirty undies
12. If you have ever sat in a public bathroom stall with someone else whispering "shh" because the other person is very loudly telling you the lady in the stall next to you farted/pooped/is stinky etc.
13. If the before mentioned bathroom is the 10th you have visited in the last 30 min.
14. If you have a private mental list on which restaurants and stores have the cleanest bathrooms.
15. You actually look forward to going to the grocery store alone.
16. Standing outside a girls fitting room you ask through the door if you grabbed the right bra sized and you hear "MOM" in a horrified voice and you silently chuckle a little.
17. If that look you get in your eye tells your husband he had better take you out soon before the kids drive you insane
18. If the big party you have been planning all year is a child's birthday party
19. You silently cringe as the person driving your car narrowly misses the curb in the middle of the empty parking lot.
20.If you have boobs that are magazine worthy.....only the magazine is National Geographic.
Well thanks for reading. Feel free to leave a comment if you know of one I missed.